deconstructing Woody

* I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

* I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government.

* I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.

* Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

* I ran into Isosceles. He had a great idea for a new triangle!

* Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.

* I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.

* If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.

Woody Allen Quotes